how to manifest a sugar mama.. in 2015

..I mean..  really??? 
Somebody actually typed this (see title) into google and ShiningMama's website came up as number ONE for this search term..
😉
I feel really sorry for the guy (I assume it was a guy), because boy, was he in for a surprise.. 
Not only did he not find what he wanted but he found quite the opposite of a sugar mama - or the way to manifest one..
And I hope to be number one in google for less weird search terms.. 😊 Let's manifest that, shall we?

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one of the DKV notebooks

 During this year at DKV I was writing notes to myself (the ideas I was talking about above) - about my dreams and the mini-visions I would allow myself while working. After collecting hundreds of little folded post-its, written with a 0.3 Hardmuth, I decided to turn to little tinyyyy notebooks and ended up with a kind of an inspiring-inspiration diary in short notes or sentences. 
Two weeks ago I have finally put order in and re-read all these notes.
Let me tell you, I was gobsmacked (love this word, so accurate)..
In these little scribbled notes there it was: the structure of 2014… Many other things, too, that I might make into a little book soon - but a lot of what happened this year is written there. 
At the time, I thought these things would sooner come to be. Some of them did - as I surprisingly became a mother after a few months from writing my wish for it in the blue notebook.. (Not only that I wrote about my wish but I woke up one morning with some words in my head, Nana Lupe - which I searched on the internet and interpreted that I would do something with theater and children in August next.. It was not what I interpreted - but I got pregnant in  August next..) 

Some excerpts from my little notebooks:
".. to organize evenings, to share inspirational movies.."
(Shine Café anyone?)
".. give workshops in my living room.." 
 (and I now give workshops in my living room - 4 living rooms further down the road) 
".. raw food and fresh juices are served.. " 
(I honestly thought I discovered raw food only in 2011??!! But no, it was there in 2007 - and it is now, with Shine Cafe)
".. I am pregnant with my biz.." (well, the Universe had other pregnancy plans :-) )
" .. I am a wonderful mother.." (- this was written moths before I got pregnant..) 

[If you are surprised about the way I wrote it - in the manifestation circles they teach you to state what you want in present tense, like you're already there, so that the Universe hears you and helps to bring it into 3D)  
(if you want to know more about it, ask me :-) .]

Bottom line, in 2007 I was just "fooling around" with manifestation.. (maybe that's why it took so long.. :-) ). But I wrote it down - and it is happening now. (actually there is no clear recipe on how to make things happen - or on how fast they can happen.. I believe in the timing on the Universe, also, and in learning things along the way.. things that came to me this year would've not been useful if they appeared in my life a few years ago.. ).

Nowadays I actually do it differently - and sometimes I can see the results sooner... I use a lot of self invented and/or well-known tools that work better.. :-) 
For example: two years ago I have collated almost to the bits the entrance of a home that we moved in 4 months after.. (and at the time of the vision board I wasn't planning to move, I just thought that it was a beautiful image).. I had also collated (almost to bits!) the view I later had from my living room in our new home.. As I make my tools mostly about mood and colors, these were extreme examples.. 
Or: last year my vision board was a huge butterfly.. Two days after making it, on ChristmasEve, a living butterfly came, no kidding,
out of my fridge,  (probably from between the kale leaves, where it obviously first was a caterpillar). It did not survive more than 4 weeks in our living room because it did not eat (did not like banana very much).. Nevertheless.. it was weird and wonderful - and a sign :-).. Later, in the summer, I was in Bucharest and this amazingly colored butterfly chose to come and stand on my hand and my book three times for a long while during an hour - I was with Victor in the middle of an extremely crowded park, where it did not land on anyone else.. 
As I was making it, though, my butterfly vision board felt as it was not only 2014 I was making it for - but a few year later, too.. (i see in there a Center for Single Moms+Children, next to the beach.. It was clearly not something that could happen this past year).

Intuition and momentarily inspiration also play a huge part in the process of planning..

This last December I was planning to set my vision and plans for 2015. 
It did not really work out as we were increasingly sick, Victor had 4 types of flu and now ends this "trip" with a itchy infectious disease.. He did not sleep much - and me even less because I wanted to make sure he can sleep, I held him during the nights and listened to his breath.. As healthy as Victor was since birth, it all changed when he had to have antibiotics some 10 weeks ago.. He also almost stopped eating, some days he would not feel hungry at all.. (please do not worry, we now have an appointment at a homeopathic doctor and it will all work out). Because of lack of sleep my immunity system also took a less than best turn and I had my share of coughing (as you may have read in my last blog).. 
All in all, December was more of a forced holiday than a planned one.. And no time for planning.. 

So I will share my plans and visions for 2015 with you really soon, as soon as I get to it.. 
Until then, I wish you a wonderful year, full with love, light, acceptation and abundance.
And, if you had set up some New Year resolutions, please consider to make a plan and/or vision books and/or boards, in the way that best speaks to you. So that those resolutions have a chance.. :-)
(One wonderful way to do that is via the ah-mazing yearly books of Leonie Dawson.. )

*ps: what happened further with my last job: nine months into the yearly contract DKV and me both came to the conclusion that it was best if we let go of each other. They told me that I did not fit the profile and I felt actually relieved, to my surprise. 
Two more things happened at the time that made me believe there is somehow "a way things are supposed to be" (I always knew that there is somehow an Ariadna thread that our life follows..).. Even if I would've worked even more, even if I would've become what they wanted (which I resisted), even if they had decided that I fitted the profile (read: mold) they wanted me to fit in (read: I would've had to grow from an organic wild purple cherry tomato into a glasshouse, tasteless, red tomato, 4cm tall and with a perfectly round circumference 3cm radius).. in September that year the Crisis came.. From 45 or so employees in the year I left DKV, in the next 12 months all of the people with a temporary contract were let go of.. (20 or more).. Soon after, DKV disappeared, it was split in a few little offices.. 
More than that, I became (unexpectedly) pregnant in the last week of my contract at DKV. And as much as I loved working for them as an architect, I am sure I would've hated it to be pregnant with the long stressing hours I would've spent in the office.. And I would've hated it having to come back at the office when my baby was so tiny, knowing that I would be let go of after a few months..

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my DKV notes on post-it

In 2007 I started a one year contract working  for DKV, one of the most internationally respected architecture offices in Rotterdam at the time.. 
I had a smashing salary and was quite proud of myself.
While working there I lived in a meditation center and then moved in a wonderful apartment, on the 13th floor of a flat in Rotterdam. 
At DKV, they wanted to make a senior architect out of me and I thought I wanted that, too. I worked long days, changed the initial contract from 4 to 5+ days a week and wanted to learn and do everything so that I can become who they wanted me to be. 
But something was nagging at me.. The life I lived in the meditation center, teaching meditations, helping people to go inside and solve their emotional problems, organizing smashing enlightened dance parties, making art decor for the said parties and making art, meditating.. that was what my soul wanted and longed for (and yes, architecture was in there, too, but not only)..  
In the office I was the awkward one, never fitting, always a bit too alternative, not interested in drinking beer after work or enormous amount of coffee during work.. I could not understand most of my colleagues's jokes (any more) and any shallow manner of living and talking was becoming more and more foreign to me. I was reading "weird" books (about manifestation and stuff, see, I'm getting there), could work better while listening to motivational speaking during the endless computer work and drawing, and the ideas I was jotting down when I was inspired where about art, beauty and energy.. They were less (read: not) about how many square meters the newest law said that a WC must be.. It was quite obvious (not to me, at first, but to my colleagues and bosses) that my heart was not entirely into my job, even if at that moment it saw it completely as my dream work.. * (*=more about what happened, if you want to know)

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found on the internet, anonymous (I guess you'll see why)

.. It's that time of the year again.. 
Most of our winter holidays are over and done with.. 
I hope you had a wonderful time.. And if you didn't, that's ok, too. 2015 comes with a new chance and you have a bit less than 12 months to plan a winter holiday that will go better.
Coz that's the major word of the day, isn't it? 

Every time it's New Year we start afresh, or it seems that we are. At least, most of us people I know seem they are.. 
(NOT if you are Chinese or if you are somebody who does not keep the Gregorian calendar - aka you keep the 13 moons calendar or you celebrate new year in the summer - or you live in a remote part of the taiga where you have no idea which day it is.. But then again, you probably do not read this)..
Back to us the "normal" peeps.. We start each new year with resolutions. 
Most of us. Me.
I certainly used to, anyway.
And before , I was just superstitious.. 😊
"Before" I used to believe that how I spent my time at New Year's Eve will be how I'll spend the whole year.. Which is kinda ridiculous really, because Romania is in East Europe and, even when we had nothing else, we still had our four seasons.. Freezing was not in the charts for the summer and freezing we did for many of the N(ew)Y(ear) eves.. Starving, yes. It worked out like that: if we had very little to no food at NY's Eve, we also had little to no food over the rest of the year. But I digress..
After I heard about the NY resolutions (about 10 years ago and I was not in Romania any more).. I just thought that they misspelled "revolution". Which made sense on one level, as Romania had its revolution with Christmas and NY in '89.. Just kidding.. That was no revolution.. (.. but that's for a whole other kind of blog post). (And I digressed again.)

Anyway.. Resolutions.. I had to read a lot about them to finally understand what they were. 
I actually did not start to seriously think about resolutions until a few years ago when I felt that it would be nice to start each year - or make any transition - with a bit more awareness..

In the mean time I also learned that NY's resolutions do not "work" in 99% of the cases. Either because the things listed are too contrasting with the day to day experience of the person, either because they are too big and thus overwhelming - and I think mostly it is because people are just plain lazy.. Hmm, that did not come up too nice.. Nicer: I think that most of us really resist change.. And if the NY resolutions are about getting results - and not about the process - it's a false start. " I am going to loose 10 kilo's" - even if it should be by March, if it does not have a champion change plan behind, it's going to fly out of the window in two weeks. Because, like my friend Einstein used to say "insanity is doing the same thing expecting different results".. The pounds will not get lost if we don't have/make a good change plan and stick to it.. 

When I started taking "resolutions" seriously, I came at it with a different approach. 
I do not have/make NY resolutions. 
I make plans.
I make vision boards and feeling collages. 
I write about it and I make videos about it.
I implement. I come back to my plan and make a new, more accurate one. I implement.
I manifest it, baby :-)

2014 was a challenging year and a wonderful one. It brought me so much! I dreamt and wrote about..
And, to be honest, it brought me some wonderful things I did not even dare to dream about.. At least, not last year, as I've dreamt most of my 2014 in 2007-2008.
Let me explain.. :-)

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